Don’t get me wrong. I am very glad to be home (though slightly bittersweet and missing my Marines and my Divas). However, now that reality is starting to set back in here, I am beginning to get the blues a little bit. Today was the first day at work that everything started to come together (projects, meetings, etc etc). While it took 3 days, it *only* took 3 days. And I love it. I’ve always enjoyed my job and looked forward to going to work. But I think it took so much starting to happen at work for me to start stressing out about how much I have going on in general that I need to get in order when I’m back.. I’m starting to wonder how long people think I need to recuperate as opposed to how long I think I need and at what speed of pace I can operate for the next couple months.

So far I haven’t been doing too bad in my opinion. I’m slowly unpacking and as I am, I’m figuring out what to do with things rather than just throw them everywhere. I’ve started sorting items and washing all that came back with me from Afghanistan. I’ve been checking my mail and I’ve started to get my checkbook balanced again and a hold on where I am with all my bills.

Likewise, I’ve been making a list of items I need to accomplish and know in the back of my head which ones can wait and which ones can’t. I’ve also been spending less time on the computer, so I don’t see the list as often.

I’ve made sure to see most of my friends and at least contact some that I haven’t had a chance to sync up with yet. I have the projects I do outside of work on my back burner and have started to contemplate them and where I need to pick up.

All the while, I’ve been trying to figure out how to keep my health in check and get this sleep thing figured out. That’s been the worst. Some days I only want to sleep 4 hours, and some days it’s 12. There are days I fall asleep at 6pm and days I’m still anxious and going at midnight.

However, today I started thinking of all the things I have to do… I have items that desperately need sold, thrown out, donated, etc… from before I left and while I was gone. I have taxes to do. I have random missing things I really need to eventually find. I have a budget to figure out and organizations I need to get back on top of such as IxDA at multiple levels, Smunch, and Phoenix Actually. I have 30 before 30 goals I am a few months behind on.

I’ve done some good things such as the weight I’ve lost while I was gone.. but because of it I have tons of clothes that don’t fit I need to do something with and I need to find some clothes I can wear in the mean time until I reach my goal and can go crazy on clothes.. and even that that’s going to be expensive.

I also was able to pay off all my unsecured debt (credit cards, medical bills, etc) from those bad times in  my life when I was in between school and jobs and dealing with a crappy economy. This is good, but there are also things I want such as saving for a house, taking some dance classes, and all that. So, I really have to learn to budget without letting these pile up ever again. Part of this is learning to ride my new bike when I get it more, so that I am saving on gas and exercising at the same time.

I know I will get there eventually, but my overachiever self expects me to bounce back right away… or at the very latest by August when I have visitors for vacation. Hopefully this feeling will pass. For now, I’m going to forget about it and go to the gym.